Take a look at an apple tree. There might be five hundred apples on the tree and each apple has ten seeds. That’s a lot of seeds! We might ask, “Why would you need so many seeds to grow just a few more apple trees?”
Nature has something to teach us here. It’s telling us: “Not all seeds grow. In life, most seeds never grow.”
So, if we really want to make something happen, we better try more than once. This might mean: We’ll attend twenty interviews to get one job. We’ll interview forty people to find one good employee.
We’ll talk to fifty people to sell one house, one car, one vacuum cleaner, one insurance policy or a business idea and we might meet a hundred acquaintances just to find one special friend.
When we understand the “Law of the Seed”, we don’t get so disappointed. We stop feeling like victims. We learn how to deal with things that happen to us.
Laws of nature are not to be taken personally. We just need to understand them and work with them.
In a nutshell, successful people fail more often. But they plant more seeds.
When things are beyond our control, here’s something that we must not do so as to avoid misery in our lives:
— We must not decide how we think the world should be.
— We must not make rules for how everyone should behave.
— Then, when the world doesn’t obey our rules, we get angry!
— That’s what miserable people do!
Similarly, let’s say we expect that:
— Friends should return favors.
— People should appreciate us.
— Flights should arrive on time.
— Everyone should be honest.
— People should behave in a certain manner.
— Spouse or best friend should remember our birthday.
These expectations may sound reasonable. But often, these things won’t happen! So, we end up frustrated and disappointed.
There’s a better strategy: Demand less! Have less expectations so there will be no disappointments. Neither the world functions as per our will nor is anyone obliged to live up to our expectations.
For things that are beyond our control, we should tell ourselves:
“I would prefer this, but if that happens, it’s okay too!”
This is really a change in the mindset. It is a shift in attitude and it gives us more peace of mind.
We prefer that people are polite… but when they are rude, it doesn’t ruin our day.
We prefer sunshine… but if it rains, it is okay too!
To be happy, we either need to —
a) change the world, or
b) change our thinking
It is impossible to change the world, but easier to change our thinking!
If we walk bare feet on earth and if it hurts, then it is easier to wear a pair of shoes to protect our feet than to carpet the whole earth!!
So, it is not the problems that we face that is the issue, but rather it is our attitude attending to the problem that is the biggest problem.